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Tuesday, July 11, 2006
FATE

A note was stuck to my door this morning. It was from a girl. Her name's Aredhel and she was interested in becoming my roomate. Apparently, Mika Smith [my friend/ Mew's cousin] heard of my loneliness and told her that I needed a roomie. She left me her cell # too but I was way too out of it to call her this morning. I was hungry, and in need of some supplies [claritin, my head is so stuffed] so I headed out to the nearby Rochies.

Me: [Walking down the aisle at 9:30 in the morning singing Bohemian Rhapsody] GALILEO GALILEO!!

[I close my eyes and use a jar of peanut butter as a mic]

Me: REEEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

BOOM!

I accidentally crash into a young woman who's stalking shelves.

The Girl: AH! BUGGA!! [She falls backwards, knocking over some cans, almost hitting a pyramid of Cheese Puffies]

Me: OH MY GOD! [I rush over and help her up] Are you okay?? IM so sorry!!

The Girl: IM FAB BLOODY TASTIC!

Me: Oh I'm sorry *_*; I'll help you clean up.

The Girl: [She sighs and leans down to pick up a can] It's okay [she looks into my eyes] today has sucked already. It's my first day, I've screwed up 2x and if i do again, my boss is ganna axe me.

Me: Im so sorry [I reach to pick up a can, but I miss and it rolls..right into the Cheese Puffies pyramid. and just like as if it were in slow motion, they all fall down, one by one, on top of the manager]

 

 

 

Ok yeah..i got a poor girl fired.

 

[the parking lot]

The Girl: EXCUSE ME SIR? NEED SOME HELP?? OH WAIT, YOU GOT ME FIRED!

Me: I'm so sorry, I really am ...Miss--

Her: Aredhel.

M: Aredhel Cray???

A: How did you know?

M: I'm Jake Lancer.

A: OH?! MIKA SET ME UP WITH A BLOODY BLOKE??!

M: Please , Aredhel, let me make it up to you.

A: Well....

 

And so Aredhel and I became roomates, her paying FAR less than I.

And we have become the bestest of friends..

 


Posted at 03:52 pm by JLancer
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Wednesday, July 05, 2006
The Letter

Ok so I wrote Mew a letter saying our goodbyes. I still want to be friends, but not like this.

Posted at 04:52 pm by JLancer
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Tuesday, July 04, 2006
Happy 4th

I saw Mew again today. She was at the fireworks show with that Japanese guy again. when I saw her, my heart beat so fast.... I still love her so much... But I've blown it.

 

I need to write her a letter

 

peace


Posted at 11:12 pm by JLancer
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Monday, July 03, 2006
Today

Today was cool, I got some drugs...PRESCIBED of course. I dont run that street life anymore. I'm a good boy.  A stupid boy, but good. Dr R has told me that I'm officially bipolar. So now it's official, I'm on lithium. I've got to get to work.

Peace

 


Posted at 02:10 pm by JLancer
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Sunday, July 02, 2006
And I'll never be with you

It's 12 and I'm amazed that I'm awake. I stayed up all night listening to James Blunt again. It's rather fitting to how I feel now. I'm broke and alone. I payed my rent and now I've got to work so I can get more cash. But I didn't have work today, and now I feel like a shitfaced loser.  I've got to see Dr. RF tommorow. Get things off my chest, It's the first time I'm ever seeing him since Mew told me about him so long ago.

She really did want to help me...and all I did was fuck things up.

Ugh what the fuck is my problem??

Maybe DR RF can help me..

 

-jake


Posted at 12:00 pm by JLancer
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Saturday, July 01, 2006
First Post

Here I sit Alone

I really do miss Mew.

I don't know why I always screw things up. Perhaps love just isn't for me.


I sat on the T today heading into downtown Boston when I saw her. She hasn't changed that much. Her hair seems longer, shiny and fluffy, I always loved her blonde/black hair..She's happy too. She was with some japanese dude and she didn't see me... He had his arm around her waist and she looked flushed.

I know I can never be with her again...

I need a drink.. something hard.

Something that I can use to forget her.

But I have no money.

Ah fuck it. I'm doing to bed.

-jake


Posted at 02:44 pm by JLancer
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JLancer
December 16th 1984  (Age 27)
Male
Salem

Music I like now: James Blunt Back to Bedlam
Songs By Blunt that I dig-
"Goodbye My Lover"

Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your hand.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I am a dreamer and when i wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.

[x2]
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bare my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.

I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.



"You're Beautiful"

My life is brilliant.

My life is brilliant.
My love is pure.
I saw an angel.
Of that I'm sure.
She smiled at me on the subway.
She was with another man.
But I won't lose no sleep on that,
'Cause I've got a plan.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

Yeah, she caught my eye,
As we walked on by.
She could see from my face that I was,
Flying high, [ - video/radio edited version]
Fucking high, [ - CD version]
And I don't think that I'll see her again,
But we shared a moment that will last till the end.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
I saw your face in a crowded place,
And I don't know what to do,
'Cause I'll never be with you.

You're beautiful. You're beautiful.
You're beautiful, it's true.
There must be an angel with a smile on her face,
When she thought up that I should be with you.
But it's time to face the truth,
I will never be with you.
   

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